I have a grill but I think I need one of these.  Well I don’t need one but I want one.  The downside is the out of this world price tag for a big green egg.  I think it will be on my wishlist for a long time.

I would like to try Taco Bells new volcano taco.  I almost ordered one the other day but when I got to the counter I chickened out.  I am fine with the lettuce, cheddar cheese and seasdoned beef.  It is that red taco shell and volcano sauce that scares me.  I am pretty sure I can take the heat and finish one.  What worries me is the aftereffects of eating a volcano taco.  I am afraid Pele will give me a case of the fiery squirts that I won’t soon forget. 

I love most things maple flavored.   Maple syrup = delicious and I am not talking about that fake corn syrup with maple flavoring stuff I am talking about the 100% Amber Maple Syrup.  I also like maple bacon and maple sausage.  I like maple fudge.  I recently found maple cream cookies in the grocery store and I love them.  The maple tree has to be on of the best tasting trees out there. 

When I think of a hamburger calling itself a slider I think of White Castle. I like small burgers because it makes me feel like I am a giant. You can pick it up with one hand and shove the whole thing in your mouth. There are no White Castles here so imagine my excitement when I saw that two large chain restaurants have new menu items that they bill as sliders or big bites. I went to both restaurants to try them out. First, I went to Chili’s. The menu shows four tiny burgers on four tiny little buns. I ordered it. What did I get? One large burger cut into quarters. That is not a slider. It wasn’t even what was pictured on the menu. There were no tiny round patties with round buns. Just a hamburger cut into four pieces held together with a toothpick. Next stop was Friday’s. They have a few types of sliders. I ordered the Tennessee BBQ slider. The menu shows two small burgers. What I actually got was one hamburger on one bun. The bun had two toothpicks in it. Just because you have two toothpicks in it doesn’t make it two burgers. They didn’t even try to make it look like the picture on the menu. I had to take my knife and separate the burger and I separated the two halves like a skilled surgeon separating a set of Siamese twins. Cut in half it still didn’t look like the picture. Two restaurants. Two burgers. Two days of disappointment.

Not nearly as good as canned bacon.

There are few things as delicious as bacon. If you need proof that God loves us look no further than bacon. It is a divine gift given to use to make our lives a little tastier. It is a well known fact that everything tastes better with a bit of bacon in it. I learned that in my first week of culinary school. The only problem is the time it takes to cook and than there is the mess you have to clean up. That is why I don’t eat as much bacon as I would like.  That is until I found canned bacon.  Fully cooked canned bacon.  40-50 slices per can and it comes in a case of 12 cans.  That is 480 slices of pre-cooked pork deliciousness.  According to the site canned bacon hasn’t been available for 20 years. Top scientists have been developing the next generation of canned bacon for the last two years and now it is available for purchase. It has a shelf life of 10 years so it is perfect emergency food. I am going to put a few cans in my hurricane supplies. I have ordered my case. Now any time will be the right time for bacon.

A pinch of this, a dash of that, slaughtering chickens in front of a live audience. All ingredients in making a successful cooking show.

While in Oahu Mrs.  Mai Tai and I rented a car.  We took a drive to the windward side of the island.  I was looking for the North Shore because I wanted to see the surfers and the big waves.  Here is a tip for all you travelers.  There are no signs telling you when you have arrived at the North Shore so make sure you know where your going.  Otherwise you will drive right by it like we did.  Driving makes me hungry and I decided we needed some food.  We started to see lots of shrimp trucks.   If there was just one I would have probably would have just driven by and stopped somewhere else but when you see so many you think that that they can’t be half bad.  Plus we don’t have shrimp trucks in Orlando and it meets my criteria of places to eat when on vacation.  When on vacation you should avoid national chains at all cost.  You can go there anytime.  The place should if at all possible be local and unique.  We stopped at a bright yellow truck that said Shrimp Shack on it.  They had a dining area right next to it.  We both ordered some garlic shrimp with rice and had some corn on the cob as a side.  It was really good.  If you find yourself on the windward side of the island and are hungry try one out for yourself.

Fairs don’t have just fried food.  They have delicious hot beef sundaes.  It is a concoction of mashed potatos, cheese and sliced roast beef.   I couldn’t bring myself to try one. 

On occasion I feel adventurous and like to try new foods.  This was the case as I strolled through the produce department of the local grocery store.  As I walked through he aisles I found a fruit I have never tried before.  It was in the citrus section but looked different and had a name to match Uniq fruit.  It resembled a grapefruit.  A grapefruit that was 100 years old.  The skin instead of being smooth was all wrinkly and thick.  I smelled it and it didn’t smell bad so I thought I would try it.  I took it home and proceeded to peal it.  It looks like your standard citrus fruit on the inside.  I can’t say that I was overly impressed with the taste.    It was sweeter than I expected but it was very dry.  Very little juice.   Maybe my fruit was over ripe or not ripe enough I am not sure.  Maybe it was perfect.  One thing I can tell you is that I won’t be running out to buy another one anytime soon.